The Tipping Scale
As I find a way to utilize this platform more, I do not want to make these posts incredibly personal. Realizing photographers and photography blogs are a dime a dozen, one may not find anything from my posts useful, whether they are too personal, more of the same or more of my latest work. While, I ultimately will not make a habit of getting into the details of my life here as I'm introverted and protective of my privacy. But I want to share this as I think it will help others in similar situations - even though I'm sure it's redundant. It has come to the point, where the scale of my personal life and my professional life is at a tipping point where professionally I have taken off and personally I'm falling apart. And now the time has come to find that balance again.
I remember when I started getting into photography and how excited I was. Of course, I didn't have any clients so everything I did was personal and full of creativity. I would take photos of my kids, my friends' kids, and random piece of fruit because it would be part of my daily "photo a day" project. Everything was great and wonderful and I was excited to move on to the next step and see how far I could take this. Fast forward a few years...where I have come into my own. Found my style, my niche, have worked with incredible clients and together we have done some pretty incredible work! I have taken on some amazing projects, my work featured in legit publications, recognized by some of my favorite international designers and even a museum exhibit where an image I took of my youngest son was on display along with work done by other photographers. The experience of what I have accomplished has been exciting as well as humbling.
I have no regrets, except for one. I have lost the balance between work and family and now seeing the results. This is where I keep my personal life, personal. But I know everyone has been here at one time or another. While professionally I have evolved from creative amateur photog to full-time business owner. That life is now filled with contracts, accounting, meetings, photo shoots, taxes, client correspondence, projects, and other administrative work. Jobs have become less what I can do creatively and more of what fits in certain technical parameters. My schedule is always booked whether it's a client, a social function or a doctors appointment for one of my three children. Things have become so out of control to where I'm going from one thing to the next, and gone are the days where I get creative, come up with new work. And most importantly, gone are the days where I have time to enjoy my family. I have lost patience with those who are most important. And my family understands first hand how life is precious and how tomorrow is not guaranteed. So why do I continue down this path?
Time to reset! The time has come re-evalute my time. Will, I still take on clients and grow this business I have built? Absolutely. I love being behind the camera! Not only do I need the creative outlet, but I love to share my work with others and I will continue to do so. Professionally focusing on smaller goals and brainstorming with clients to get more creative and not going through mindless motions because there is a looming deadline. Creativity takes time. And I may not be the right person for all the jobs. Personally, I want to make my family time more meaningful. Shutting down my phone and work when they are present so I can be present for them. Of course, there will be exceptions but overall, boundaries need to be set and adhered to in order for balance to be maintained. I also want to focus on enjoying life and experiences and share those with others. More travel, more enjoying the simple pleasures and more of the people who are most dear.